November 11, 2024 by
You’ve just settled Mom into bed after a long day. You’re exhausted—physically and emotionally—and there’s still a list of tasks waiting for your attention. Maybe it was the struggle with getting her to take her medication today that wore you out. Or perhaps the call from a family member who offered well-meaning but impractical advice is what caused that extra level of stress. Caring for an older loved one can be one of the hardest roles you’ll face in your lifetime. Prioritizing self-care for caregivers and building emotional resilience is crucial, and it’s the foundation that will help you keep going when the days are tough.
So how exactly can you build emotional resilience? There are some simple but effective steps you can take today.
- Embrace what you can control, and release what you can’t. It’s easy to feel like every setback is a reflection on your abilities as a caregiver. Did Mom refuse to eat again today? Did she get frustrated during her physical therapy session? These moments can feel deeply personal. But building emotional resilience starts with recognizing that you can’t control everything. Instead of focusing on what went wrong, try to concentrate on what you can influence. For example, you can’t control whether Mom decides to eat every meal, but you can control offering nutritious and appetizing options. When you let go of the pressure to fix everything, you give yourself space to focus on what you can improve.
- Celebrate the small victories. There will be days when everything feels overwhelming. It’s easy to focus on the things that didn’t go right, but emotional resilience is built by shifting that focus to the wins, no matter how small they may seem. Did Mom finally smile after days of feeling withdrawn? Did you manage to carve out five minutes for a cup of tea while she napped? These moments matter. Emotional resilience grows when you acknowledge these small victories, because it reminds you that your efforts are making a difference, even if the road is bumpy.
- Lean on your support network. No one can do it alone, and the truth is, you don’t have to. Building emotional resilience means knowing when to ask for help. Whether it’s reaching out to a friend, joining an online support group, or partnering with At Home Independent Living, sharing your burden lightens it. If a neighbor offers to bring over dinner, say yes. If a family member offers to sit with Mom for an hour, let them. It’s not a sign of weakness to accept help; in fact, it’s a sign of strength because it shows you’re committed to sustaining yourself for the long haul.
- Practice self-compassion and self-care without guilt. Caregiving is often synonymous with selflessness, but you can’t pour from an empty cup. Practicing self-care for caregivers doesn’t have to mean taking a two-week vacation (although that would be nice!) Sometimes it means allowing yourself ten minutes to read a chapter of a book, watch your favorite show, or take a short walk around the block. Self-compassion is just as important. When things don’t go as planned, like a doctor’s appointment that turns into a meltdown, it’s easy to blame yourself. Instead, try treating yourself with the same kindness you would show a friend in your position. Remind yourself that you’re doing the best you can, and that’s enough.
- Develop a flexible mindset. When you’re caring for an older loved one, plans often change. Maybe today was supposed to be an outing to the park, but now it’s a day of dealing with a flare-up of health issues. Emotional resilience isn’t about resisting these changes; it’s about flowing with them. Rather than focusing on what you couldn’t do, think of what’s possible now. Instead of that outing, perhaps it becomes a cozy afternoon with their favorite movie. Adapting your expectations helps reduce feelings of frustration and disappointment, which ultimately builds a stronger, more resilient mindset.
Let Us Help!
Caregiving is never a role you need to fill alone! Our trained, experienced care professionals are on hand to partner with you to ensure the best quality of life for the person you love, and the chance for you to discover a healthy life balance for yourself. Serving Camillus, Clay, Syracuse, and the surrounding areas in Central New York, we’re just a phone call away at (315) 579-HOME (4663).