November 11, 2024 by Dean Bellefeuille
You’ve just settled Mom into bed after a long day. You’re exhausted—physically and emotionally—and there’s still a list of tasks waiting for your attention. Maybe it was the struggle with getting her to take her medication today that wore you out. Or perhaps the call from a family member who offered well-meaning but impractical advice is what caused that extra level of stress. Caring for an older loved one can be one of the hardest roles you’ll face in your lifetime. Prioritizing self-care for caregivers and building emotional resilience is crucial, and it’s the foundation that will help you keep going when the days are tough.
So how exactly can you build emotional resilience? There are some simple but effective steps you can take today.
- Embrace what you can control, and release what you can’t. It’s easy to feel like every setback is a reflection on your abilities as a caregiver. Did Mom refuse to eat again today? Did she get frustrated during her physical therapy session? These moments can feel deeply personal. But building emotional resilience starts with recognizing that you can’t control everything. Instead of focusing on what went wrong, try to concentrate on what you can influence. For example, you can’t control whether Mom decides to eat every meal, but you can control offering nutritious and appetizing options. When you let go of the pressure to fix everything, you give yourself space to focus on what you can improve.
- Celebrate the small victories. There will be days when everything feels overwhelming. It’s easy to focus on the things that didn’t go right, but emotional resilience is built by shifting that focus to the wins, no matter how small they may seem. Did Mom finally smile after days of feeling withdrawn? Did you manage to carve out five minutes for a cup of tea while she napped? These moments matter. Emotional resilience grows when you acknowledge these small victories, because it reminds you that your efforts are making a difference, even if the road is bumpy.
- Lean on your support network. No one can do it alone, and the truth is, you don’t have to. Building emotional resilience means knowing when to ask for help. Whether it’s reaching out to a friend, joining an online support group, or partnering with At Home Independent Living, sharing your burden lightens it. If a neighbor offers to bring over dinner, say yes. If a family member offers to sit with Mom for an hour, let them. It’s not a sign of weakness to accept help; in fact, it’s a sign of strength because it shows you’re committed to sustaining yourself for the long haul.
- Practice self-compassion and self-care without guilt. Caregiving is often synonymous with selflessness, but you can’t pour from an empty cup. Practicing self-care for caregivers doesn’t have to mean taking a two-week vacation (although that would be nice!) Sometimes it means allowing yourself ten minutes to read a chapter of a book, watch your favorite show, or take a short walk around the block. Self-compassion is just as important. When things don’t go as planned, like a doctor’s appointment that turns into a meltdown, it’s easy to blame yourself. Instead, try treating yourself with the same kindness you would show a friend in your position. Remind yourself that you’re doing the best you can, and that’s enough.
- Develop a flexible mindset. When you’re caring for an older loved one, plans often change. Maybe today was supposed to be an outing to the park, but now it’s a day of dealing with a flare-up of health issues. Emotional resilience isn’t about resisting these changes; it’s about flowing with them. Rather than focusing on what you couldn’t do, think of what’s possible now. Instead of that outing, perhaps it becomes a cozy afternoon with their favorite movie. Adapting your expectations helps reduce feelings of frustration and disappointment, which ultimately builds a stronger, more resilient mindset.
Let Us Help!
Caregiving is never a role you need to fill alone! Our trained, experienced care professionals are on hand to partner with you to ensure the best quality of life for the person you love, and the chance for you to discover a healthy life balance for yourself. Serving Camillus, Clay, Syracuse, and the surrounding areas in Central New York, we’re just a phone call away at (315) 579-HOME (4663).
August 13, 2024 by Dean Bellefeuille
Caring for an older loved one is an act of love and devotion, but it can also feel like a never-ending marathon. The emotional highs of shared smiles and laughter can quickly be overshadowed by the physical and mental exhaustion that comes with the burden of caregiving. This challenging journey can leave you feeling overwhelmed, stressed, and isolated, a state known as caregiver burden.
Understanding Caregiver Burden
Caregiver burden encompasses the emotional, physical, and financial toll that caregiving can take. Emotionally, the constant worry and stress about your family member’s well-being can lead to anxiety and depression. Physically, caregiving tasks such as lifting, bathing, and moving the person can cause significant strain and fatigue. Financially, the costs of medical supplies, home modifications, and potentially reduced work hours can lead to financial stress and uncertainty.
Social isolation is another key aspect of caregiver burden. The demands of caregiving can drastically reduce your time for social activities and connections, leading to feelings of loneliness and isolation. This lack of personal time can also mean sacrificing hobbies and other activities that previously brought joy and relaxation.
Steps to Alleviate the Burden of Caregiving
Recognizing the signs of caregiver burden is the first step towards managing it. Here are some practical steps you can take to bring you peace:
- Seek Support: Don’t hesitate to ask for help from family members and friends. Even small tasks can make a big difference. It’s also helpful to look into a caregiver support group, either in person or online, for emotional support and tried-and-true advice from others in similar situations.
- Utilize Respite Care: Respite care services can provide regular, temporary relief, allowing you to take a break and recharge. At Home Independent Living is pleased to offer respite care services that allow you to take the time away you need while knowing your family member is thriving under the care of a trained professional.
- Take Care of Your Health: Make sure you’re scheduling routine check-ups and talking with a mental health professional as well if needed, to ensure all of your health needs are fully met. Regular exercise and a healthy diet also need to be a top priority to ensure you have the energy and strength needed in your caregiving role.
- Use Resources and Tools: Utilize tools like the Caregiver Burden Scale to identify areas where you may need help. At Home Independent Living also offers a wealth of educational resources to help guide and support you as you care for the person you love.
With At Home Independent Living, we offer a full range of customized aging care services that provide a healthy life balance for family caregivers while enriching the lives of older loved ones. Some of the many ways we can help include:
- Friendly companionship for engaging activities and conversations
- Personal hygiene care and support
- Transportation and accompaniment to appointments and fun outings
- Light housekeeping and meal prep
- And much more
Give us a call any time at (315) 579-HOME (4663) for more helpful tips and an in-home care partner you can rely on to walk beside you when caring for someone you love. We’re pleased to serve Syracuse, Fayetteville, Salina, and throughout Central New York.
April 18, 2024 by Dean Bellefeuille
No one likes to see the end of the weekend, but having a career to attend to on Monday is important to millions of us. It’s a significant part of our identity, signifying the hard work we’ve invested over the years and accomplishments we’ve achieved. So what happens when your parents start to show signs of needing assistance at home? Will you face a choice between a career you love and caring for aging family members that you love more? (more…)
March 12, 2024 by Dean Bellefeuille
It’s easy for family caregivers to feel alone. When you’re caring for someone else, remembering to care for yourself can be difficult. A recent listening session, however, allowed family caregivers to speak openly and honestly about what they need – and the results may surprise you. Here are some of the key findings and insights gleaned from these sessions. (more…)
December 18, 2023 by Dean Bellefeuille
Caring for a loved one is often an all-consuming role. It requires so much of your time, focus, and energy that when caregiving ends, for any reason, it can leave you feeling lost. Other common feelings to expect when you are no longer serving as caregiver for a loved one include: (more…)
August 11, 2023 by Dean Bellefeuille
It’s hard to predict how someone with dementia will behave from moment to moment. The disease can transform a person’s mood, personality, and behaviors in the blink of an eye. When you’re at home providing care for a person with dementia, these changes can be hard enough to manage. But what happens when you’re at a restaurant, grocery store, or hair salon? (more…)
July 5, 2023 by Dean Bellefeuille
Contrary to popular belief, PTSD doesn’t just occur after experiencing life-threatening danger. PTSD (post-traumatic stress disorder) can arise after any traumatic event or experience. It may surprise you to learn that providing care for a family member is one of the main causes of PTSD: a condition known as caregiver PTSD. However, it’s common for the condition to go unnoticed and untreated. This is because the person receiving care is usually the primary focus of both healthcare providers and the family at large. (more…)
March 7, 2023 by Dean Bellefeuille
When you start to detect the warning signs that senior care help for parents is needed, very often, an elderly parent won’t accept help. After all, acknowledging the need for help isn’t easy, especially for somebody who appreciates their independence and privacy. Yet, what do you do when another member of the family is the one pushing back? If you’ve come to an impasse within your family about the need for senior care, there is one very likely culprit that may be in play: denial. (more…)
January 17, 2023 by Dean Bellefeuille
Wandering. Pacing. Fidgeting. When you start to note these common issues in a loved in with dementia, it is time to take action before they intensify to agitation, aggression, or leaving the house. You may soon find that pinpointing the reason that the individual is feeling uneasy is sometimes half the battle in relieving restlessness in dementia. (more…)
December 9, 2022 by Dean Bellefeuille
Does your blood pressure soar when you finally finish filling your cart with groceries, only to find just one checkout lane open and a line of annoyed shoppers ahead of you? Or when you arrive five minutes early for a doctor’s appointment, only to have to wait 45 minutes to be seen? Some people just seem to project an inherent sense of patience, regardless of the circumstances. Wouldn’t you love to know their secret, specifically when it comes to finding extra patience as a caregiverfor an older adult? (more…)
